There are many different parenting styles but whatever type of parenting style you use the one vital ingredient is the relationship you develop between you and your child. When a child has a good relationship with their parents they are happy, good at solving problems and able to set clear boundaries for themselves.
You are not your child’s friend.
Many parents think that having a good relationship means being your child’s best buddy. This is not what it is all about. A good relationship with your child starts from the day they are born. The comfort you give him with feeding, comforting and general care is the first step toward creating you relationship.
Your child needs unconditional love to be secure. He needs to know even when he has done something that makes you angry it is the behaviour that is the problem not the child.
This is when he first learns he has boundaries and that some behaviors are not acceptable. From there he will learn to set his own boundaries. Children who can do this will be less likely to be influenced by peer pressure later when they are teenagers.
Communication is the key.
When your child talks to you give him all your attention. You need to make eye contact and be sure he knows you are hearing what he wants to tell you. Share his pleasure in his achievements and support and sympathize with him when he fails.
Many parents do not hear what their child is really saying. You need to actively listen to hear what your child really needs. Does he need encouragement, approval or is he really looking for your full and undivided attention.
An old fashioned way to have some quality time with your family is by having all meals at the dining table together. Turn the TV off and use this time to really connect with each other. Make it enjoyable family time.
Discipline is important
The word discipline comes from the Latin word “disciplina” which means “teaching, learning.” If you just use some form of punishment you are not teaching your child how to make the right choice next time. Find how to teach more appropriate ways to handle the situation so next time your child will have a clear choice.
Of course he won’t learn immediately so make sure you are consistent in how you handle his behaviors.
It is never acceptable to hit your child. This will not teach him anything positive. It is more likely to teach him to solve his problems by hitting.
Setting limits is Important.
Your child feels secure when he knows he has boundaries and knows what they are boundaries. It is up to you to establish the boundaries . It is important that your child knows the rules and what the consequences will be if he breaks those rules. Consequences need to be related to the misdemeanor. Making him chop the firewood for a week won’t teach him keep his room tidy.
To have a strong parent child relationship you need to be consistent firm and fair.
You are not your child’s friend you are his parent, and his teacher. It is important that he knows he has you in his corner and if things go wrong, that he can go to you for support and guidance.
Establishing a strong parent child relationship is not rocket science. It is based on unconditional love, communication, consistent fair and firm discipline that has taught your child clear boundaries.
If you have done all these things you will have a child who is happy, responsible and independent. A good parent child relationship is essential for the growth and development of your child
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