Fussy Toddlers Temper Tantrums – Are They Driving You To Despair?

By | 19/01/2016

If your toddler has started throwing tantrums you are probably tearing your hair out and wondering what the heck you did wrong to bring this on.  Believe me this is pretty common behaviour for toddlers and it has nothing to do with anything you have done.  Is it time you looked for help to manage these difficult times?  There is a very good program available to you and it does have a 60 day refund guarantee.

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Typical toddler tantrums start around 18months and last to about age 3.  The child will kick, hit,  throw themselves down and some will hold their breath and may even vomit.  I had a cousin who would hold her breath until she passed out.  As soon as she did she would start breathing again but it was very stressful for everyone around her.

What sets off the tantrum?

A tantrum can be brought on a lot of reasons including over stimulation, tiredness, stress or hunger.  Tantrums can be triggered by another child taking a toy away or it can be just because the other child touched the toy.  Your child’s temperament can also play a part.

Your young child does not consciously decide to have a tantrum.  He has is responidng to a situation he can’t understand or can’t cope with.  The way you handle tantrums at this stage is important.  If you give into  your  child then these tantrums are likely to continue because the child is learning they will get what they want if they tantrum.

How can I stop the tantrums

  • It is important to establish set routines. Bath time, meal time, sleep times should be set and remain consistent so the child knows what to expect.
  • Wherever possible let your child make his own choices.  When getting dressed give them a choice of clothes to wear and let them decide which they want to wear.  This method can be used with some foods, choice of what he would like to do, play with hi toy cars or hear a story or play with his building blocks.
  • Try to plan shopping when your child is not likely to be tired or hungry and if you anticipate having to wait in line take along some treats to give him such as a snack or a toy he prefers.  You could also involve him in this decision too.
  • When you child can ask for things do not anticipate what he wants if he points to it.  Ask him to tell you what he wants and encourage him to use words.
  • After awhile you will learn what triggers your child’s tantrums and be able to avoid those situations.  One trigger may be toys or sweets in the shops .  If you can avoid them it is good but many supermarkets make it difficult to avoid them as they are depending on the pester power of your child to sell more.  If that is the case try distracting him when you pass these danger spots.
  • Praise is the one thing that we all respond to and your toddler does to.  Be generous with your praise when he is behaving well.

There is a program available that can help you the more challenging behaviours of your toddler.

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Summing up

Having a tantrum throwing toddler is distressing for any parent but it is important to try to stay calm.  Do not give in or over react when you child tantrums.  If you handle it well and show him his behaviour is not getting him what he wants he is more likely to grow out of it sooner.

When children get what they want by throwing a tantrum they will continue to do it  and it becomes learned behaviour.  Stopping it becomes more difficult and the longer it goes on the longer it will take for you to stop it.

The worst times for tantrums are meal time and bed time so try different ways to make these as much fun as possible.  A favorite treat if they eat their meal and a story or a cuddle and lullaby at bedtime will often work.Remember like everything this too shall pass.

If dealing with your toddler tantrums is getting you down the you might like to take a look at this review.

<<<Review On Talking To Toddlers Program>>>


If you have a toddler tantrum story I would love to hear from you.  What did you do?  Has it stopped?  Whatever you would like to pass on.  My best wishes to you and your family.

Nanna Knows what you need in your tookit








10 thoughts on “Fussy Toddlers Temper Tantrums – Are They Driving You To Despair?

  1. Lauren

    I loved your website and the post you did on toddlers and tantrums. I have a preemie almost 5 month old girl so I soaked up all the information I could from your site. Your use of visuals and colors are great and i enjoyed visiting. If you have any pointers you could give me on building my site I’d love to hear them.

    1. admin

      Thank you Lauren,

      Having a premature baby must have been a worrying time for you and I hope what you find on my site is helpful to you.

      I don’t usually do this but I will send you a private email to the address you provided with more information shortly.

      My very best wishes to you and your baby


  2. Crystal

    Hi. I enjoyed reading you article and agree with your methods 100%. Especially the part about not encouraging tantrums. I used to ignore my little sister whenever she throws a tantrum to get what she wants and then give her my full attention when she finally quits and asks properly then I would say something like “I really like when you ask for what you want instead of screaming about it. That was very good, good girl. Do you want anything else before I get back to work?”

    Great Article. Thanks

    1. Margaret Kennedy Post author

      Hi Crystal,
      Your approach to the problem is excellent. Thank you for sharing it.

      I think when parents try to stop the tantrum it just makes it worse because the child is getting the attention they want. It is a shame but little ones do not distinguish between good and bad attention. They just want attention. By doing what you are doing your little sister will quickly realise she likes the good kind.

      Best wishes to you

  3. William "Nuggie" Nugent

    Thanks for the toddler tips. I do not have children yet, but when I came across your post I read it anyway. I may need the info one day, or even 3 times the info. I like your approach and I agree with you. I like that you talk about planning the stressful time more carefully. I like that you reward the most stressful times like dinner and bedtime. A story at bedtime is a great idea and it will promote reading and educate the child early. Thanks Nanna.

    1. admin

      Thanks Nuggie,

      Being prepared for what is ahead is always a good idea. That way you can have a set of solutions ready when something happens. You are right about reading. One of the greatest gift you can give a child is a love of books.

      I am sure you will make a great day.


  4. Tim

    I don’t have kids but we are planning to. Man I had no idea of some of the tantrums these little guys would chuck… holding their breathe..!

    I think I would freak out if my child did that lol!

    I like some of the points you brought up on how to deal with this, I will be bookmarking and using this site as a reference. Thanks for sharing 🙂

    1. admin

      Hi, Tim,

      Glad you found my site helpful and bookmarking it for future reference. I hope I haven’t put you off having a baby, they are wonderful and you will adore it even if it stretches your patience sometimes.

      Have a great day


  5. Cassia

    Thank you for this wisdom-filled article. It’s true that finding opportunities to praise a child (catching them doing good) helps increase the child’s confidence level and sense of security. It’s also a good reminder that how we react to a child’s tantrums affects how long or how quickly the behavior is going to last.

    1. Margaret Kennedy Post author

      Hi Cassia,

      Thank you for your comment. Babies should come with a handbook but unfortunately they don’t. Praise is important and will bring out the best in your child. Constant criticism will bring out the worst.

      Tantrums are hard to take at times but the main thing is be consistent. It takes time to tame the tantrums.

      I am pleased my post was of help to you.

      Best wishes



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